Hoarding is not well understood today, it is due to the fact that hoarders possess their own reason and logic. Their reasoning is very astute and ingenious.
You need to understand that before you can come up with interventions on how to help a hoarder, you must first begin to understand the underlying reasons for such behavior.
Here are some points that you need to understand to effectively help a loved one or a friend in such condition:
First, learn to build a relationship with the person (the hoarder).
Before they even begin to pay attention and lend their ears to what somebody needs to say, they primarily require to be understood and respected. Hoarders tend to live in continuous fear and anxiety; fear of debauched things that could possibly happen, fear of unpreparedness and fear of being misinterpreted by people.
They have trust issues when it comes to getting their needs attended to and they extremely feel susceptible and unsafe in the society and the people around them.
Before they break down the wall and let somebody in, they require to be fairly valued and recognized for the good intent behind every single behavior they do however strange they may appear to most people.
Second, you need to understand the hoarder’s reason behind the behavior.
Their judgment is primarily about avoiding and getting equipped for the most awful situations they continually visualize. The only error in their reasoning is every so often that they never thought of considering other possible means of getting prepared that could lead to a similar feeling of being safe even without having to hoard so much stuff.
Habitually, they have not entirely considered and evaluated the advantage of what they consider as solution to their anxiety against the actual worth they are compensating to uphold that sense of security.
They also generally don’t credit themselves for efforts they have done such as the extent of creativity and ingenuity they demonstrate when faced with worst circumstances. Realizing that they can in fact endure agonizing feelings is indeed an immense measure of dealing with compulsive hoarding.
Third, you need to understand the importance of beliefs and trust to them.
In order to help a hoarder, you have to understand that it similarly necessitates a huge amount of perseverance and determination. You need to totally commit yourself to completely and profoundly comprehend how they benefit from their schemes and what foundational principles and feelings lay beneath their reason.
Stimulating those fundamental principles, views and opinions is a dangerous attempt since it requires you to be sensitive to the cues they may be giving you as an effect of their profound beliefs being penetrated.
You can attain a good relationship with a hoarder the moment they begin to trust you believing that your intention is to help them achieve what they need. Be sure not to give them the impression that you only want to get rid of all their stuff.
The intention to help hoarders may be very clear to us, who want to help them but it takes another hand on the other side for the help to be received. And the only way to get the other end respond positively to the help we’d like to offer is to fully and profoundly understand where they’re coming from.